Who’ll be the next Vikings coach? A guide to figuring out who it won’t be

Who will become the 10th head coach in 62 seasons of Vikings football?

Don’t know.

But …

We can safely assume who he won’t be like.

He won’t be older or old-school. Candidates 55 and older with a bag of Red Man in their top drawer need not apply.

He will come from the offensive side of the ball. His version of the Lord’s Prayer will begin … “Our McVay, who art in Heaven, Hallowed be the 9 Route …”

He won’t run a “fear-based organization.” He will be player-friendly but not too player-friendly because then he’ll be Leslie Frazier, whose first-ballot Hall of Fame friendliness and inability to win consistently begot Mike Zimmer’s blunt-force interpersonal skills and inability to win consistently.

And, finally, he will be media friendly. So media friendly that we’ll need showers to hose the butter off the questions he still probably won’t answer.

The tendency to flip-flop between this firing and the next hiring is not just a Zim thing. It’s pretty much that way anytime a team is forced to look for a new voice.

Denny Green feuded with the media. Mike Tice was a media rock star. Brad Childress was an offensive tactician. Frazier a defensive guy.

Zimmer was hired to fix Frazier’s supposedly outdated schemes. Eight years later, all Zimmer’s fixes became unfixed while Frazier is getting ready for more head coaching interviews after leading the Bills’ defense to No. 1 in…

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